My former main man Kwame (qua-me) came by to see me the other day.
He asked me if I had missed him since he’d been away.
I began to feel all confused inside,
But these feelings I tried to hide.
I didn’t want him to know,
That sometimes I struggle and wonder why I ever let him go.
However, I crossed my arms and said, “There’s no room for you here anymore!”
“Turn right around and go back out of my door!”
My man Kwame wouldn’t be moved.
He said my lack of love for him, I’d have to prove
He moved in close, but I stayed strong.
“Kwame if you think I still have love for you, you’ve got it all wrong.”
“Oh really? But I’m your biggest fan,”
“No matter how far you go, I’ll always be your man”
“Not my man, I am so over you”
“Not hardly baby, I’ll always be your boo.”
“You see, we go way back, further than the eye can see.”
“The truth of the matter is, there never has been or never will be, a you without me.”
By now Kwame’s so close I can feel his breath flowing down my throat.
His grip is on me so tight, I feel like I will choke.
I struggle to get loose, but he won’t let me go.
I beg and plead, but he only says no.
He whispers in my ear, “How dare you try and get rid of me.”
“I was down for you from the beginning, I will never leave you be.”
“I was there when your own father broke your heart.”
“It was me who kept you from falling apart.”
You see, I am in control”
“I own your very soul.”
“I was there for you when your hard times went bad.”
“I lifted you up when life made you sad.”
“No Kwame, no! You don’t own any part of me.”
“Just leave me alone. Go away and let me be.”
He laughed a hearty laugh and looked me straight in the eyes.
“Girl, without me, you may as well whither up and die.”
“Alone you are nothing.”
“But with me you are something.”
“Stick with me and I’ll bathe you with my power.”
“Together we will reign and make those beneath us cower.”
“They’ll bow down in fear”
“They’ll shiver whenever we are near.”
“Sweet lady don’t you want to be with me?”
“Surrender yourself and I’ll set you free.”
I cried out in pain “Kwame please let me go.”
“Baby, I can’t do that. I’m going to have to say no.”
“Kwame, I could never be with you again.”
“There’s just too much pain.”
“I have a husband and kids; with you I have nothing to gain”
Kwame said, “Girl please, we were together before there was a him or a them.
“I was your first and I’ll be your last.”
“You can’t just push me aside, like a thing of the past.”
I struggled violently against him and shook myself free.
I ran to another room, shut and locked the door. “Kwame you don’t own me”
“I have too much to lose and everything to gain.”
“Being with you has already caused me too much pain.”
“Go away, just go away. Having you in my life turns everything upside down”
“You have to go. I no longer want you around.”
Kwame slammed his fist against the door and said, “I’ll give you your space.”
“But I won’t go too far, because you know you’ll never find anyone to take my place.”
“You’ve been my ride or die chick for most of your life.”
“I’ve been your number one man, battling all your strife.”
“No one will ever do you like I can.”
“Just trust and believe, I will always be your number one man”
I could feel Kwame’s presence leave me, even through the door.
When he was finally gone, my soul and my body sank to the floor.
I cried an awful cry.
Tears left my body like rain leaves the sky.
My eyes were blinded with agony. My own wails deadened my ears.
Each one riding out of my mouth, on my own insurmountable fears.
But I heard a voice coming from deep within
It said, “you have to chose, either seek me or continue to wallow in your sin.
The voice said, “he who seeks me will have ever lasting life”.
“All you have to do is turn away from your sin and your strife.”
“Surrender to me and I can truly set you free. “
“You see my child there will be no everlasting you, without me.”
Through my tears I asked, “Can you truly love and protect the same as Kwame?”
He responded, “You relied on Kwame, because you did not know me.”
“You know better now. Your soul should tell you that I can truly set you free. “
“I’ve already promised you that I would never leave or forsake you.”
“I am your Lord God. I died for you.”
“I know, I know what you did, but you see, Kwame and I have been together forever.”
He’s been my protector, he’s so very clever.”
“In my darkest hours he held me tight.”
“Somehow he always seemed to make it alright.”
Then the Lord said to me, “So why turn away from him and then to me?”
“I know Kwame is like an illness or a drug. To stay with him will be my demise.”
“He’s like the forbidden fruit. If I continue to bite into him, I shall surely die.”
“So I turned to you for a change.”
“But all these emotions have me feeling deranged.”
“I know Kwame will be the death of me”
“But for some reason, I can’t seem to break free.”
“I can’t run far enough. He will catch up and destroy me.”
And the Lord said, “My child I have already promised you that no weapon formed against you shall
“Come to me and I can defend you against him and heal your wounds. I am your protector and your doctor.”
“I am your savior. I died for you.”
“By doing so, I opened the best door you can ever walk through.”
“Now get up off the floor and come out of the darkness. Walk through the door and into the light.”
“I will give you the gift of my strength and my might.”
“Let me show you where my heart is. It is where it has always been,
Dwelling deep inside you, on me you can depend.”
“I will never let you down.”
“With me there will never be a need to frown”
“For I am that I am”
“I am the blood of the lamb.”
“Put your faith in me”
“Eternal life you will see.”
“I can heal all of your pain”
“I can bring you sunshine, even in the rain”
So I rose up off the floor
Promising myself to run to Kwame no more
As hard as it will be,
From Kwame, I will wrench free
It has been a long hard struggle
Serving Christ or Kwame I have chosen to juggle.
But I can’t serve two masters
Having done so has certainly been a disaster
But now I chose Christ
In Christ I am given redemption
For all of my sins and transgressions instead of death, I receive exemption.